Inform your work with an understanding of the depth of stigmatization and discrimination  faced by lesbians and gay men in a predominantly heterosexual society.

2. Recognize that the gay community is not a single entity. The lesbian, gay, transgender and bisexual communities are highly varied in terms of race, religion, ethnicity, dis/ability and  political beliefs.

3. Assist clients in identifying options if they wish to receive service from a lesbian or gay counsellor and make appropriate referrals if necessary.

4. All clients need to have their sexuality openly acknowledged regardless of whether they are strongly identified as lesbian or gay. Recognize that heterosexist attitudes may impede disclosure of abuse.

5. Institute a rigorous assessment procedure to assist you in determining who is the victim  and who is the perpetrator when cases of so-called "mutual battery" come to your attention. Check to ensure you do not assume that the person accompanying a victim to an appointment is not the perpetrator.

6..Be aware of the difference between battery and sado-masochism (S/M). They are not the same thing. S/M is often blamed or used as a way to dismiss battery and violence in gay and lesbian relationships. S/M is considered consensual power play for pleasure that includes safeguards such as agreements and "safe words" to stop a "scene".  If those measures are not respected, it may mean abuse is happening.

7.  Use non-heterosexist language (partner, spouse) when asking about sexual partners or perpetrators until the sex of the partner is disclosed.

8.  Be knowledgeable of possible referrals to gay-positive support groups, legal advocates and intervention programs for batterers.

9.   Inquire about issues related to children, e.g. are there any child witnesses to the abuse? About 30% of lesbians have children. Issues related to children witnessing violence in lesbian or            gay relationships will be similar to heterosexual relationships. Fear of being "outed" may however exacerbate the issues for children of lesbians/gay men. Children or youth of lesbians presenting issues related to witnessing violence could be dealing with issues  concerning violence in a previous heterosexual relationship. In addition, lesbian mothers who are not the biological or " birth"  mother to a child may be deterred from taking legal action for fear of a homophobic response from the courts regarding custody and access arrangements.

10.  Be aware that sexual assaults can be perpetrated by same-sex partners. Lesbians may be less        likely to receive service for sexual assault from a woman.

"In working with victims/perpetrators in gay/lesbian relationships I frame the abuse as power and control issues. I offer them a language of responsibility and accountability. I help the victims with the impact of abuse and their safety needs. I help the perpetrators look at changing their behaviour.' Alysa Golden

Tips for organizations/agencies

1. Check your resources and advertising material (mission statement, philosophy, brochures, intake forms, house rules, etc.) for inclusive language.  For example:  do intake forms include the terms lesbian, gay and same-sex partner when asking about marital/family status or next of kin?

2.Review recruitment, hiring and evaluation practices to ensure homophobia is addressed as a barrier to volunteering, employment and  promotion. For example:

• are candidates questioned about homophobia and providing service to lesbians/lesbian families?
• are jobs/volunteer positions posted to reach lesbians and/or gay men?
• is anti-homophobia/anti-heterosexism education provided for all new staff, volunteers and board members?

3. Check policies and programs to ensure they are inclusive and create a gay-positive work environment for staff as well as clients. For example:

• do personnel policies include benefits and bereavement policies for gay/lesbian families?
• do anti-discrimination/affirmative action statements include sexual orientation?

4 .Evaluate your programs for responsiveness and accessibility to lesbians and gay men who are victims/perpetrators of domestic violence. Some frequently overlooked issues include:

• family violence programs addressing children witnessing violence in lesbian or gay relationships;
• parents dealing with issues related to having gay children; and,
• the availability of gay and lesbian positive books, videos, periodicals, or articles for clients and staff.